Can punish, but also gives tender comfort when needed; can eat pussy with passion, can put your mind/body into erotic humiliation (within limits) and can cook a damn fine, delicious but healthy meal for you/us..how many other Doms can say that?

[STANDARD MEMBERS CAN VIEW & CONTACT ME. Update: Apparently you can only view my first photo; send 'waive' to get pics of me in swim trunks at beach My Blog: Reflections / Fear of the Dark Or Leave me a private message here via my Blog.

Gather ye rosebuds while ye may, Old Time is still a-flying; And this same flower that smiles today, Tomorrow will be dying.

Beautiful, poetic, and true words; On the contrary, this preciousness reminds us that if something is worth doing, it's worth doing right. Quality over quantity (or speed). In the following paragraphs I offer insights into who I am, the many things I have to offer, and what I look for in a potential partner. This cannot be done in sound bytes; so sitting down comfortably, allow your most erogenous organ (your mind) to explore below...

I'm an attractive, slim, fit, successful and secure SWPM, non-smoker, who is drug and disease free (I also don't drink but it's perfectly ok if you drink moderately) who takes care of himself. I am looking for friendship connections and conversation first.

Enjoy emotional intimacy; when the time is right, cuddling, and giving massage (non-sexual but sensuous/sensual relaxation, or building to erotic) enjoy giving in many other ways, physically but also emotionally and mentally to the woman, investing in the relationship

Looking for a special woman who is also giving (in all the above ways, not just physically), who is not a player or just a taker, who understands that giving fully means much more than physically, who is looking for more than a physical thrill, who also seeks additionally to the physical, the deeper, meaningful, powerful connections and the powerful psychological states and emotional places where D/s can take us within a space where you are comfortable being vulnerable, after you have known me enough so that trust has been built.

I am an experienced, empathetic (and thus gentle when appropriate) but intense Dom (I speak mostly of non-physical intensity, but if on the physical side you truly need something more intense than we have explored, I'm certainly capable of increasing intensity there too..so long as it's not 'edgeplay' ) I'm equally, a guide/teacher skillful at understanding the psychology and emotions of women's inner needs. These vary depending on the woman, of course, but the magic happens through a dance-like back and forth process of delving into and getting to know your inner erotic world, it's tensions, triggers, apparitions, contradictions, and pathways to release, healing, and catharsis.

There is no contradiction between being the Dom, being in control, versus putting the sub's inner needs at the heart and center as I do, for it is her reactions - including the physical but primarily the non-physical - which, in fluid but careful relation to her adroit, passionate, but empathic Dom, form the foundation for the D/s exchange, including for what is most satisfying for him.

Open and honest two-way COMMUNICATION is central and critical before, during, and after, for physical and non-physical safety, as well as for the deep fulfillment possible through this path.

Though I am a natural mentor in control of himself who can help you grow, this, too, is a two-way street. Paradoxically, the sub must on at least the level of the basics, be a "master" of herself. In other words, if your own life is in chaos, or a constant roller coaster ride, I wish you well, but please stay away, or find someone else.

In other words: . Not just in the obvious and often mentioned ways (please be solidly stable emotionally and have at least basic financial stability) but also physically: if you are constantly moving at 100 mph, cutting down on your sleep, rushing from one thing to another multi-tasking, you may feel you are at the top of your game/career/life..and perhaps in some ways you are, but you are not able to slow down, step back, and fully communicate with me, and equally deeply, to look fully inwardly, inside yourself. At least, not as I define such things. If you are a fast-laner, you probably want a Dom/Master who will introduce you to a pile of brand new toys each time, who knows 100 knots and other tricks, and is skillful on those levels.

To put it differently: have you heard of the "slow food movement"? That is a closer analog to where I am coming from, as far as D/s goes, as opposed to the "fast lane" type..I won't call it the "fast food" kind, which may be a bit unfair to those whose KINMK (Kink is not my kink) The fast-laners would disapprove of my less expansive collection of toys (far less than 100) and lack of skills in the fancier areas of D/s (advanced decorative bondage and so on)..this has never held me back with the kind of woman and relationship I value, however.

In fact, my first time practicing D/s the words of that particular woman...who herself had a LOT of experience in vanilla sex and some in D/s and who was bi and experienced with both women and men..her words were, "you know things about women and their response and psychology, that I thought only women knew." Yes, those were her words. And that was at a time when my own past experiences with women was much more limited. It's not as though I've had a huge number of partners, I haven't ("I'm not that kind of guy!") but I have significantly more experience today, than I did back then.

So which is it? To, to some sensation-play focused fast-lane S&Mers, I'd be considered a Dom of quite 'modest' experience, and skills (sorry, haven't learned intricate advanced "art" bondage or how to use a bull-whip and don't expect I ever will..I am also not into club type "scening", as you might have guessed) but as the quote above is only one small example of, in fact I possess a relatively rare ability in the realm of the slow, sensuous, physical D/s that is used as a pathway towards the inner forbidden world of the erotic psyche.

I want to add here that the latter philosophy (mine) includes pain as a means but not as an ends, or to say 'pain yes, but not suffering' or to say 'erotic humiliation? yes, degradation? never' - however, to each person those words might mean something different, so such things might best be clarified in one on one communication.

Though skilled at giving physical pleasure (when earned..) my specialty is in working at the emotional and psychological level for release the sub equally needs and craves, while promoting growth in that area as well.

I'm a very giving person...and enjoy to get to know you first before we connect physically. I have gentle, skilled, loving hands, and know how to give a nice massage, be it a back-rub or a luxurious slow whole-body massage that takes you from away from life's worries towards relaxation, and slowly from relaxation to arousal. In fact this may be one of my 'flaws' - unless with a very giving sub, I may offer more such massages etc than the number of times I instruct that I be given one. You need to be able to be ok if/when that happens and your body is at center stage; but also I'm hoping you have intuition to offer, when appropriate, even without being directly ordered ordered to.

~~~ ♥   ♥ ~~~

If you have any questions, drop me a note. Interested in dialog rather than potential relationship? Just say that up front. Same if you are bi/switch, currently asexual, been burned in the past, or abused as adult or child, etc, if/when you are ready to share more.

UPDATE: Working on restarting my personal website which has several erotic D/s stories I've written plus some D/s philosophical outlook and emails from my readers including a romance writer doing research who changed her mind about D/s from negative, after seeing my website..Happy to send you the url of my personal (noncommercial, I just anonymously registered the domain name) website...just drop me a note, ask, even if you're not seeking relationship..

(Final note: some fields like 'endowment' which I filled in years ago seem a bit too mechanical or tacky, but System hasn't, so far, allowed me to make those questions invisible, and putting 'prefer not to say' would only look stranger..just fyi, that if it were up to me I'd not advertise so loudly such things for first impression readers but am stuck with it for now..)

***WARNING: Any institutions or individuals using this site or any of its associated sites for studies or projects - You DO NOT have permission to use any of my profile or pictures in any form or forum both current and future. If you have or do, it will be considered a violation of my privacy and will be subject to legal ramifications.

My blog on Alt is called "Fear of the Dark / Reflections" a link follows: [Link to my Alt blog] See especially the post "Fear of the Unknown" And, if you want the url of my personal website off alt (expanded Bio, my erotic stories, and analysis essays on D/s), but too shy or not ready to send me a full email, then just send me a 'waive' and 'hug' (so I know you're not a 'Russian Bride' or other scammer) and I'll email you back with a simple url for my website to learn more about me, with no obligation or expectations